Only yesterday was I laughing, smiling, and grateful for such a happy and positive start to the new year. In fact, my friend said I was ‘glowing’. As soon as he said it I knew I was back and Ed had taken a backseat!
This morning I found out the sad news that my Grandad had passed away. I have never had to deal with death close to me. I am grateful everyday for the fact I have had four grandparents until I was 21. I am incredibly close to all of them. I know my Grandad is in peace now but I can’t help but feeling annoyed that whilst everything in life seemed to be going so well, there is yet another test. Another challenge. And another battle. And this time not just for me, but for all my family. I don’t want me or my family to be sad, in pain, mourning or crying.
Only last night my friend shared with me that “God thew all this shit in my face, yet he knew I had the strength, patience, determination to deal with it”. People are given challenges in life when God believes they are strong enough to deal with it. So for today, I am going to hold onto the fact that me and my family are strong enough to get through this.
My Grandad had a long and happy life and that is something to celebrate. I don’t know how to mourn, fortunately I have never had to, so I don’t know what I should be doing right now. So I am going to celebrate the good and happy life of my Grandad, be grateful that I spent Christmas with him, be grateful that he saw all his family over Christmas and try my best to keep laughing and smiling. I know that my Grandad was happiest when he saw his family ‘glowing’.